Design & Disaster by Committee

If I gave you some money and some art supplies, would you repaint the Sistine Chapel or the Mona Lisa for me?

Or, if I gave you a chisel or jackhammer, would you mind improving on some of Michelangelo’s sculptures like David, Moses or The Pieta?

Better yet, if I lent you a synthesizer and a harmonica would you mind rewriting Ludwig van Beethoven’s Ode to Joy? Maybe you could add some echo effects or add a dance beat under the cellos.

I got it: why don’t we hire an illiterate, un-travelled ditch digger to rewrite William Shakespeare’s folios.

In fact, we could call a round table of all our uninspired, unimaginative, boring and untalented friends to vote on how we should improve some of these inspired classics.

How’s that sound?

Now, any sane person with a mote of self-review would realize they are blatantly unqualified to improve upon the masterworks of great artists.

Yet, for some reason, there is no shortage of bureaucrats, administrators, mid-level managers and failed creatives who are more than  happy to tell a) the artist, how to demote your grand vision from inspired to retired; or b) the businessman how to run his business into the ground.

I guess it is human nature to desire those things you can’t have; a gross impulse for some supervisor in a studio who has no storytelling sense whatsoever to lord over the script he’s financing to fool himself and those fools around him that he “contributed” to the script.

This happens a lot. This might even be the source of James Cameron’s famous temper.

This is why we have to endure a steady barrage of dumb movies from Hollywood.

The best strategy? Find a brilliant iconoclast who can decapitate all the pretenders to the throne, execute an emotionally relative film, make millions, and posses enough inertia to remain outside the broken lockstep of blundering bureaucracies.

That should work.


~ by David Jetre on January 4, 2010.

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